Hitting The Road

I’ve changed. A lot.

Exactly a year ago today I acted upon a decision I made that would change my life forever. I packed up my truck with my clothes, laptop my cell phone and drove 1400 miles to New Hampshire.

It was the scariest yet most exciting thing I have ever done.

I can’t tell you exactly what route I took. I only remember setting the destination in TelNav and just drove, drove, and drove until I reached my destination.

The route kept changing depending on the time of day and the traffic. I learned about toll roads, safe rest stops and the overwhelming need to find a hotel at one point – to take a bath.

Many of my friends thought I had lost my mind. My family couldn’t believe that I did it.  I didn’t allow myself think about all of that when I was making the trip. I kept my focus on the target. I kept my eye on the my goal.

I am was, for the most part, an over-thinker. I have talked myself out of 99% of the things that I wanted in my life. That left me settling for 1% of things I allowed for myself. More times than not I settled for what was in front of me, easily available, instead of aiming for what I truly wanted.

For the first time, in a very long time, I didn’t run from anything or anyone. I simply, in the truest form of the word, went for something that I wanted and sincerely needed for me.

I didn’t just wake up and say “I’m moving” and then made the move. No, I had a couple of dry runs which were for all purposes just me chickening out.

I am not bragging. I am not an amazing person. I am, for once, a human that made a decision and stuck to it.

I am grateful that I did something, made something happen, for me.

We have all been in situations where someone that we cared about needed something and we made sure they got it. We moved heaven and earth to make sure that they got it. Many times it was something that wasn’t needed but would enhance their lives or help them with their day to day lives.

A year ago today, I did that for myself. I didn’t do it to anyone or because of anyone else. I did it for me.

A year ago today many people thought that I was the most selfish insane person they knew.

~~~~~

Today:

I am no longer the moody person I was a year ago.

I have a job.

I don’t have to take medicine to calm my nerves.

I don’t drink.

I exercise.

I smile, from the heart.

I pay my own way.

I am happy from the center of my being.

I love myself.

I respect myself.

I don’t run from problems.

I don’t run to problems.

I am more accepting of others.

I look forward to each new day, and embrace the adventures that it brings.

I am my own hero.

 

One Response to “Hitting The Road”

  1. Janet
    Says:
    November 29th, 2011 9:17 pm

    Inspiring post…glad I stopped by and browsed around your blog today!

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